Comedian Bil Nye, who headed up last Saturday's "March for Science" and has advocated imprisoning global warming skeptics, has a new TV show aimed at teens. Here's his latest effort to scientifically prove that it's attitude, not biology, that determines sex.
This one goes out to all my bipeds who identify as ladies!
This world of ours, is full of choice
But must I choose between only John or Joyce?
Are my options only hard or moist?
My vagina has its own voice. Not vocal chords, a metaphorical voice.
Sometimes I do a voice for my vagina, please don't tell me I'm the only one who does that.
'Cause my sex junk is so oh oh oh much more than either or or or!
Power bottom, or a top off. Versatile love may have some butt stuff!
It's evolution ain't nothin' new, there's nothin' taboo about a sex stew
Just add salt or Gerard Depardieu (French treasure)
'Cause my sex junk is so oh oh oh! Much more than either or or or!
If they're alive I'll date'em, Channing or Jenna Tatum
I'm down for anything, don't box in my box!
Give someone new a handy, then give yourself props (Enter nerd guy who looks disapproving)
Oh you're such a smartie. Did you learn gay in college?
Chill with all of that while I drop some knowledge.
Sexuality's a spectrum, everyone is on it. Even you might like it if you sit up on it.
Drag queen, drag king, just do what feels right...
You're tall, pansexual, flirty wood sprite!
Who enjoys a fleshlight in the cold moonlight? With a sad clown Skypin' via sattelite?
Damn skippy homeslice sing it with me all night
(Nerd takes off pants and starts grinding)
Sex how you want it it's your g**damn right!
'Cause my sex junk is so oh oh oh! Much more than either or or or
Get off your soapbox! Get off your soapbox! My sex junk's better than bagels and lox
With lots of schmear.