Oh, just shut up

Lizard Warren has misplaced her Apple lightning charger, so she thinks there oughta be a law mandating that all charges be interchangeable, speed, competition and technological innovation be damned. “Consumers don’t want choice, they want to be told by government experts what to do — just ask my colleague Tony Fauci.”

Did Fauxcahontas invent the USB, which revolutionized the way computers and drives are connected? No, but her great great great great grandfather Squanto did, and taught the Pilgrims how to plug them in right side up. “I don’t care if it would have cost 2x as much to make t fit in either way, “Squanto said at the time, “we would have just invented government subsidies so that everyone could afford them.”

Did she invent the iPhone in 2007? No, but she did join her Uncle Crazy Horse in declaring that no one needed one, and predicting it would fail spectacularly,

Did she invent the Internet? No, but her sister Al Gore did, and her blood brother Paul Krugman told her it would prove to have no more significance than the fax machine.

Did this primitive savage create SpaceX? No, but she and her friends on Capitol Hill did vote to establish NASA, at 100X the cost and one-tenth the efficiency.

And so on. F’k off, squaw.