Scary stuff

The latest from Americas Paper of Record

NEW YORK, NY — A terrified paparazzi photographer is asking for privacy following an altercation with the Duchess of Sussex in downtown NYC this week.

Eddie Duarte, a freelance celebrity photographer, says he's beginning to suspect Meghan Markle is stalking him after he noticed the defunct royal following him while he was trying to have dinner with his family.

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Duarte says Markle followed him throughout the evening in what he thinks was an attempt to get him to take photos of her. At one point, as Duarte and his family were driving home, Markle allegedly swerved her black SUV into his car in what bystanders describe as a ‘near catastrophic accident'.

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In response to Duarte's accusations, Markle released a 30,000-word statement detailing her need for privacy along with her daily schedule and minute-by-minute agenda, in case any other Paparazzi want to take photos of her very private life.

“Defunct Royal” is a nice description of the lady married to the man formerly known as Prince.