Only one of these stories has happened — yet.
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New program helps people of color adopt a white liberal to speak on their behalf.
MENLO PARK, CA—A new nonprofit organization is teaming up with app developers to help people of color find and adopt white liberals to speak for them. The program is called Adopt A Voice and will help people of black and brown descent express what they truly desire, think, and mean to say.
"I signed up for it," said African American Bradley Trent from Columbus, Ohio. "They paired me up with a 37-year-old white girl named Claire who claims to be bisexual but as far as I can tell she just really likes cats."
When asked what his opinion of the program was, Claire responded on Bradley's behalf, "Bradley is just so grateful to have his voice heard especially on key issues like women's right to choose, climate change, and especially trans issues."
Bradley later commented, "I had no idea that's what I meant to say. Amazing."
Unilever’s Ben & Jerry’s brand demands we defund and dismantle the police
Why are we still funding UCONN?
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Colonialists curtail whale’s unbridled creativity
I originally wrote a longer post on this story, including the rantings of little woke children conflating Imperialism with our revolution and the creation of a free country, but I think the quality of our state education system is perfectly captured by one Victoria Santiago, “a musical theater major and rising sophomore from Newington” (no, I have no idea what a rising sophmore is, either) who explains her reasoning for preferring a whale as a replacement mascot:
“I started looking and came up with Whales because I think it’s something very appropriate for now,” Santiago said. “Whales are associated with compassion and solitude and knowledge of both life and death. Also, unbridled creativity. The exhalation of the blowhole symbolizes the freeing of one’s creative energy. Sound is a creative force of life.”
To the extent that Miss Santiago is accruing debt to achieve a degree in musical theater and deep thinking, it’s cruel to let her continue. And it’s even crueler to force taxpayers to sustain the farce that is modern higher education.
Oh, and Chief Seattle? Slave owner
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Juneteenth has come and gone so it’s time to start preparing for Novemberteenth to celebrate and mark November 15 1842, the date of the great slave escape from Cherokee Nation.
The 1842 Slave Revolt in the Cherokee Nation was the largest escape of a group of slaves to occur in the Cherokee Nation, in what was then Indian Territory. The slave revolt started on November 15, 1842, when a group of 20 African-American slaves owned by the Cherokee escaped and tried to reach Mexico, where slavery had been abolished in 1829. Along their way south, they were joined by 15 slaves escaping from the Creek Nation in Indian Territory.
The fugitives met with two slave catchers taking a family of eight slave captives back to the Choctaw Nation. The fugitives killed the hunters and allowed the family to join their party. Although an Indian party had captured and killed some of the slaves near the beginning of their flight, the Cherokee sought reinforcements. They raised an armed group of more than 100 of their and Choctaw warriors to pursue and capture the fugitives. Five slaves were later executed for killing the two slave catchers.
What has been described as "the most spectacular act of rebellion against slavery" among the Cherokee, the 1842 event inspired subsequent slave rebellions in the Indian Territory.[1] But, in the aftermath of this escape, the Cherokee Nation passed stricter slave codes, expelled freedmen from the territory, and established a 'rescue' (slave-catching) company to try to prevent additional losses.
Next to go: Chief Seattle. “Like many of his contemporaries, Chief Seattle owned slaves captured in raids”
And they will no longer be stocked in your favorite store’s freezer but in the soup section instead. Justice!!!!
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Eskimo Pies to change its name because … well, because!
The maker of Eskimo Pies will change the 99-year-old brand name of the ice cream treat, the company said Friday — becoming the latest organization to overhaul the marketing of a product with a racially tinged moniker in recent weeks.
“We are committed to being a part of the solution on racial equality, and recognize the term is derogatory,” the [Dreyer’s Grand Ice Cream’s] head of marketing said in a statement.
“This move is part of a larger review to ensure our company and brands reflect our people values,” the company added.
Along with the name change, the company will alter the treat’s marketing scheme, which traditionally featured a young boy dressed as an Eskimo in a snowy environment.
John Hinderaker:
So another minority becomes more invisible. I will hazard the wild guess that not a single Eskimo ever complained about Eskimo Pie. It is all idiotic pandering and virtue signaling driven by corporate suits in the marketing departments of conglomerates who couldn’t possibly care less about native peoples who live above the Arctic Circle, but care a great deal about their standing with fellow liberals. I deleted an adjective before that last noun.
UPDATE: The Babylon Bee, as always, ahead of the news. The Paper of record indeed.
Activists fight racism by driving all people of color out of pop culture
U.S.—Activists are fighting racism by demanding that people of color be removed from all media, brands, logos, mascots, and anywhere else they might pop up.
"Anywhere we see a person of color, we see racism. So we must end racism by making sure people of color are not depicted anywhere," said white liberal activist Petunia Faucett. "We will not rest until all pop culture icons of color are eliminated. Then, racism will be over."
Activists across the country cheered as another pop culture icon of color was removed this morning. "We worked hard to achieve this goal, and the day is finally here," Faucett said. "But our work is not done. We must be vigilant to hunt down people of color on butter tubs, syrup bottles, cartoons, and bags of rice, and take them out of the public consciousness."
"When only white people are shown as mascots, cartoon characters, and brand logos, we will have truly arrived at our diverse, racism-free future."
Dartmouth to remove Indian weather vane
Native Americans at Dartmouth, a student organization that supports Native and Indigenous students at the College, wrote in a statement that the image on the weather vane promotes an idea that white systems of education are “valued above” those of the Native American community.
Pretty rich, coming from a culture that in 10,000 years couldn’t invent the wheel.
Makes it easier to discriminate against Asians
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Ivy League to drop SAT/ACTs. Like popular schools in California, Harvard’s been kept busy lately defending its quota system for Asian-Americans, dreaming up “character”, “community service”, and “after school activities” as reasons for limiting their admission. Eliminating an objective standard like test scores gives college administrators free rein to work their most fevered desires to achieve the proper balance between legacies and favored ethnics — no dogs or Chinese allowed.
God, that was quick
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In the news this afternoon: While its hosts defend and encourage rioters, CNN erects fence around its Atlanta headquarters
And that's the way they like it
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Stasi ist hier willkommen
Town official banned from restaurant after bartender overhears him dissing BLM.
The controversy started when Erik Heilman, a bartender who was working the [Mission on the Bay] restaurant’s outdoor dining area last Thursday, made a post on the private Facebook group Swampscott 01907. Heilman alleged he overheard Hause call the Black Lives Matter movement “liberal bull****” and say white privilege is not real. Heilman said he was “distraught” hearing the comments, and made the post because he wanted to “inform” the community about the thoughts of an elected official.
The owner of the restaurant first fired the bartender for breaching a code of hospitality but was immediately brought to heel, rehired the nattering nabob and barred the customer instead:
[Heilman] has created a dialogue within the town and is fighting to hold public officials accountable for their words and actions at all times; not just when addressing the public.
It is with that in mind we no longer can welcome Don Hause into our establishment.
Mission On the Bay has always, and will continue to always employ inclusive hiring practices.
Some years ago I knew a woman who fled Poland for the US when she was twenty. She was successful here, got married, and had two sons, who eventually attended Greenwich High School where, she complained to me, they were taught to hate America and revere communism. “They don’t believe me when I tell them what it was like, she said. “Having to watch every word you say to a friend in a coffee shop or on the phone, constantly looking over your shoulder in case a neighbor should overhear you and report you to the authorities. They just don’t believe me, and laugh when I say I love this country.”
They might believe it now, though I worry that, as beneficiaries of a solid Greenwich High School indoctrination program, they grew up to be bartenders.
Good God, now we're going to have to carry around phrase books to go with our medical emergency bracelets
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“No no, he can breathe, I promise! But he may be pregnant — will that help?”
Med school apologizes for including phrase “I can’t breath” on exam
Medical patients may want to find a new way to convey their pulmonary distress, lest they be accused of triggering someone.
The Indiana University School of Medicine apologized to students for a question on a cardiovascular exam that included the phrase “I can’t breath[e],” according to screenshots of the question (above) and message to seniors in “All Sections” (below) that were forwarded to The College Fix. The question reads:
A patient who missed dialysis suddenly becomes pale, diaphoretic, and screams, “I can’t breath!” [sic] You glance at the monitor and notice the following rhythm. You are unable to palpate a pulse and initiate immediate CPR. The most appropriate next step in therapy is: [the options for answers are not visible]
The apology message, which is undated, was written by Daniel Corson-Knowles, assistant professor of clinical emergency medicine.
“We are very sorry to have included content, specifically the words used to express difficulty breathing, within a case presented last week in the cardiovascular quiz in a context that was insensitive and upsetting due to the similarity to phrases associated with the killing of George Floyd and several other instances of police violence against black people in the U.S.,” he wrote. (The phrase took on political significance, however, because Eric Garner said it several times as New York City police pinned him down.)
Seeing the phrase in this context “resulted in a very painful trigger for many of you,” and the school “adjusted this material as soon as we learned of this oversight on Friday,” Corson-Knowles continued. ….
Corson-Knowles said the question was “written long ago and reflected phrasing” that patients might use when “experiencing cardiac or pulmonary difficulties,” but that does not excuse the school for “not catching this very phrase and removing it when preparing the quiz material.”
The professor added that the school was “in the process of reviewing practices cases for the potential presence of intrinsic bias, microaggressions and other content that can help perpetuate stereotypes and affect how students feel, learn, perceive and treat their patients and how this translates into patients’ outcomes.”