McDonald's fires employee for asking whether Happy Meal is for a boy or a girl

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Joanna nee Johnny enjoys its non-binary … something

Joanna nee Johnny enjoys its non-binary … something

From America’s Paper of Record, which fails to note that San Francisco has already banned Happy Meals entirely.

BUENA PARK, CA—A "bigoted" McDonald's drive-thru worker has been fired after asking a customer if their Happy Meal was for a boy or a girl.

"Great, is that for a boy or a girl?" the employee asked after a customer ordered a cheeseburger Happy Meal, having waited 45 minutes to get to the speaker (there were three cars in front of her).

"EXCUSE ME --- DID YOU JUST REINFORCE THE HARMFUL GENDER BINARY!?!" the enraged customer shouted. "How DARE you! You'll be hearing from my lawyers!" After getting her toy, she sped off in a huff and immediately dialed her attorney to file a lawsuit.

The McDonald's franchise quickly apologized and fired the offending employee.

Meanwhile, in Britain, little parrots are petitioning for the end of plastic toys completely. The petition originally called for hair shirts to be substituted instead, but that provision was dropped in favor of floggings after PETA pointed out that hair is culled from animals.

Next up: Little Mike joins with PETA to demand that fast food outlets stop serving milk and soda pop.

UPDATE: A reader points out that America’s new Paper of record, the Babylon Bee, is a satirical “news” site and that therefore this story is not to bee believed. True, sort of, but it’s a sign of our ever-increasing dash to madness that one can read a Bee headline and think, “yeah, that could happen”. The Bee tells you what’s going to happen, rather than what has happened; usually that’s a mere matter of days.

Bring back ice skating in town

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Hooligans and ruffians at Binney Park

Hooligans and ruffians at Binney Park

The town has banned skating on Binney Park’s pond since 2007, when the parks department eliminated it from its budget and saved taxpayers $7,500. While it’s certainly true that a cost-conscious town like ours would never engage in frivolous spending, why not spend nothing, except refraining to threaten town skaters with arrest? There’s no need for town equipment to clear snow from the ice; if skaters don’t want to do it themselves, they won’t, and skating will be deferred until Mother Nature removes it herself. Cost to town? Zero. Safety patrol costs? Zero. The pond’s 18” deep, and skaters can rescue themselves. Firewood for fires in the warming hut? Again, zero. Firewood can be brought in by free citizens, for free.

In other words, just stand back and get out of the way.

50 Years on, we're still being fed garbage about the supposed merits of recycling

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Fairy tales for adults

Fairy tales for adults

As in this story reprinted (speaking of recycling) by Greenwich Time today on “rethinking” our recycling system.

There is no shortage of landfill space, which you may recall was the original myth back in the 70s that started this nonsense, and recycling costs more and wastes far more energy than piling up waste and burying or burning it.

Residential recycling is an expensive, feel-good activity that accomplishes nothing other than enable virtue-signalers to demonstrate their “concern”, but rather than admit that the entire concept was misguided and should be abandoned, we are busy creating new ways to waste people’s time and money. Ban plastic straws: it will make no difference whatsoever. Ban plastic shopping bags: they’ll be replaced by contaminated bags that use 100X more energy to produce and will wear out (and gross out) long before that energy waste is recovered. Ban single-stream recycling, which was always a fraud, and go to six different bins for residents to sort, wash and put their garbage in. It will cost a fortune and do nothing except waste people’s time and money.

Recycling was never an idea whose time had come, but it’s definitely time to forget it and pretend it never happened.

Another outward bound migrant

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135 Field Point Circle

135 Field Point Circle

Goldman’s former commodities head is pulling up stakes, apparently. He’s put his just-built home at 135 Field Point Circle on the market today for $20 million, and renewed the listing for 65 Clapboard Ridge, though he’s left its price steady at $6.995. He’ll likely have better luck unloading Field Point Circle; it’s a desirable address, unlike Clapboard Ridge, which was purchased for $10 million in 2007. The unhappy owner has been trying to reverse that trade since 2015, when he pitched it at $12.495.

65 Clapboard Ridge Road

65 Clapboard Ridge Road

Okay, he's not mostly dead, he's all dead

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Who needs a quarter for the coffee machine?

Who needs a quarter for the coffee machine?

They said he had died, they denied it, now Chinese authorities admit that head of hospital is dead.

Chief spokesman Kung Flu clarified things: “It just so happens that we thought our friend here was only mostly dead. Now, there's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. All dead, well, with all dead, there's usually only one thing that you can do.  Go through his clothes and look for loose change.”